Friday, October 1, 2010

Can I get some cheese with my whine?


I've been having a lot of nightmares lately. This morning was no exception. I woke up from one bad nightmare after another. You'd think that would have motivated me to stay awake, but it didn't... I'm a relentless sleeper. So needless to say, that got my morning off to a bad start. Then I wake up with my usual morning nausea (I'm not preggers, just take medicine that makes me queasy when I wake up). Then I walk out in to the living room and find that Kevin has made me breakfast, but my extra nightmare time has made my waffles soggy and not as good as they could have been. Also, they were banana waffles, so the cold flavor isn't something I can enjoy having just awoken with nausea. Alas I managed to eat the peaches served on the side and watch "Project Runway" without blowing chunks. Then I guess I went through a few more mindless things, and it wasn't until I upset my lover a few minutes ago that I realize what a downer I've been all day. I am typically a very happy and optimistic person, but this morning I have been awful and I just don't know why I can't stop being this biting, cruel thing. It seems like my mouth has spewed nothing productive this morning. I've talked to my mom and Kevin and have come out feeling annoyed that they can't understand what I'm saying. But now I've realized that it's probably just me that isn't saying what I really feel and instead projecting my anger with whatever little thing I'm nitpicking about in order to mask it. Ugh, it's gross. The worst part is that I really don't know why I'm upset. Well, more like I can't pin-point the one thing that is upsetting me more than usual. I continue to have the same levels of problems and anxiety, but I guess there's just something that's fallen out of it's little mental shelf where I've stored it. Maybe I just need a nice long bubble bath. 

That's what I'll do, a nice long bubble bath complete with those fancy bath salts someone gave us as a wedding gift. But first I'll do some yoga and tie my hair up and away from my face so that I can see clearly how lucky I am to be able to sit around planning yoga sessions. (And by yoga I really just mean stuff called yoga on TV, not like real lessons or anything haha) 

Hopefully that will make me calm the hell down and I'll get back on track. I want to make a bunch of cards this weekend. I also want to sit down and write my mom and brother's some long long letters. I love snail mail. I don't want it to ever fade out of style. 

Okay, time for action, I'll post pictures once I have something yummy and happy to share =]

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